Thursday, March 1, 2012

Talk Talk talk

Yesterday was too tired to write anything and anyway had nothing substantial to write, Even Today have nothing so important to post, Yet to continue....

Today I had work to complete and I completed. perhaps thats the difference between today and yesterday. Yesterday I couldn't complete even when I tried hard and hence felt very tired. Today It was completed though it was toiling yet I am not feeling tired today.

Maybe it's the end result which upto some extent have a say in a person being tired or not.

Other than that I was thinking only sexual things I guess which doesn't deserve mention here.

In the evening just before leaving the office I thought to have a tea, I went up. There was a person whom I find very cool in his approach, sort of crowd puller. I am just reverse to him. I don't talk to anyone until and unless some ask something or it's professionally necessary.

He asked me 'Why don't you talk?'. And my natural reply was 'What to talk?'.

'Why what so..' He couldn't find an appropriate word. 'traumatic' I helped him with that word.

'Yes, Why What so traumatic happened to you that you have nothing to talk, If not anything else teach us some PHP.' He completed his sentence.

'Let me learn first' I replied, a typically full stop type answer.

But it made me think of two things, first why don't I talk? and second why it matter for people If I don't talk.

So for the first part, I guess it didn't take me much time to find an answer, it mostly have three reasons.

1> I am fed up of the type of talk people do.

2> I don't see any point in talking or speaking. Many times it seems meaningless.

3> I am too busy listening to you.(or noticing you)

It was the second part which took me little time to get to the answer, Why does it irks or uncomfortable if I don't talk.

I think I have got an answer but I would post it tomorrow coz in this single post not enough characters are left.

So why do people get conscious when some non-talkative person is around, In what way it irks them??

The root I think is in instinct, Every thing you say make it possible for the people around you to understand you, judge you or assess you. Most of the people try to suit themselves according to different people.

Suppose If you come to know everything about someone but have never talked to him, you wont be able to truly ascertain that you know that person, However even if you don't know any details about someone and still talks to him or her regularly, you would feel that you know much about him.

Add all these factors, If someone don't talk then you don't feel that you know him well, you find it difficult to guess about what he thinks and more importantly 'How' he thinks. Hence you don't know in what way he takes your statement and comments which in turns make you conscious about your own talking. Also some people have habit to suit themselves according to the person they think that since he don't talk, he possibly don't like talking people. Those people confusingly try to curb their natural instinct creating a paradox.

Further to fathom I use to think why do I talk much with some people though I dont talk with many in general. Mostly because they accepted me as I was neither they tried to modify themselves according to me, They didn't searched or calculated or guessed my reactions. They were just themselves and it gave me the surety that no matter what I can say anything and they would say anything, There was no compulsion or effort to talk. And that's why there was no unease.

If you are giving too much attention for what I say, Then it gives me an added responsibility to check as what i am going to say and most of the time I would feel that It's better to be quiet coz people would try to interpret and decode the statement.

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